Wednesday Weigh-In #23

I was doing great all week and then…comfort and convenience food had its way yesterday.  Damn you, pizza!

Weight: 187.6

Lbs released: 0.0

Lbs to go: 57.6

 

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Wednesday Weigh-In #22 – Motivation

This morning I was gifted this great motivational video via text.  It really was the inspiration I needed to get my day started.  Hope you enjoy it too!

Sacrifice – Motivational Video (Kevin Tylecote)

Back on program…

Weight: 187.0 lbs

Lbs released: 0.0

Lbs to go: 57.0

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Refocused

I’m back. For real-for real, this time.

In January I realized that I may have been a bit over zealous thinking that I was just going to pop out my bundle of joy and then pick up where I left off.  I’m sure for some mommies it happens that way, but not me.  I was (am) so wrapped up in my little one that I put most other things on the back burner – including myself.  I can’t do that anymore.

At my last appointment with my Endo back in January, she took me off of all of my diabetes medication.  My A1c was down to 6.8 and we were both pretty excited.  Especially me!  No more pills or insulin sticks 5 times a day!  She acknowledged however, that this may all be due to the pregnancy and how I had to manage my diabetes for those months and that my A1c may change after.  She said she wanted me to keep up my healthy diet and to lose some weight and return in three months.  Well, that was yesterday.  Since that visit, I know that I have been horrible with my diabetes management.  Like I said, I have just been focused on the baby and then my maternity leave ended and I returned to work, among other things.  Life has just been hectic with transition and I have not taken time to make sure I am doing what I need to do.  I was barely taking my blood sugars once a day, if at all.  Some days I missed meals, other times I would just eat whatever I could quickly get my hands on.  So, I wasn’t expecting a stellar review at my appointment yesterday.

And, I was right.  Instead of losing weight, I gained 5lbs.  I didn’t have enough blood sugars logged for her to make a good determination if she needed to put me back on meds or not.  Basically, I failed and she couldn’t access the situation because of the lack of information I was able to provide her.  Also, the in-office rapid A1c test they used to do has been discontinued, so I have to call them or wait until my next visit to see what it is.  So, she decided that for now she will continue to keep me off meds and wants me to come back in 6 weeks.  She also gave me strict directions to make sure that I take a fasting BS every morning and that I start to shed some of this weight.  I have to get back on track.

I definitely do not want to go back on my medication if I don’t have to.  I had resigned to the fact that since I screwed up so bad these last three months that I was going to be prescribed something yesterday.  Now that I have another six weeks to get myself together, I am going to have to make myself the priority again and get myself back in the groove of eating on plan, getting some exercise in and tracking my numbers the way I am supposed to.  I have to refocus and get healthy.  Not only for myself, but for my sweet son that needs a healthy and capable mom.  I’ll do it.

Currently, I am 187.6 lbs.  Before I got pregnant, I had gotten down to 164 lbs. I’ll be back to update on Wednesday!

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Oops!

So, I was supposed to get back on track last week…or was it 2 weeks ago?  Being a new mommy has totally thrown off my sense of time and space.  I’ll be back on track soon!

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Still Here

I’m still here.  And I am still diabetic.

So much has happened since my last update.  But the greatest of them is that I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy a little over two weeks ago!

During my pregnancy, the way I managed my diabetes was totally different than how I had been prior to becoming pregnant.  Namely, I began taking insulin instead of oral medications.  After much research, I just felt that insulin was a better option for me.  I was also so consumed with my pregnancy and everything else that was going on, I didn’t make time to update this site.  I just wanted to experience my experience.  But now, I am back and ready to get back on track with my quest to get rid of this crazy disease and live a healthier life.

Yesterday, I had my first visit with my Endo post-partum and it went pretty well.  She decided since I am nursing my baby that Metformin isn’t a good option for me to return to and is considering a long-acting insulin at night like Humlin to manage my blood sugars.  But first we are gonna track my numbers for the next two weeks with no meds at all to see where they are.

I’ll be back tomorrow to do my first Wednesday Weigh-In in a long while!

 

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Milestones/Weigh-In #21

Drumroll, please…………

 

I reached my first weight release goal of 13lbs! I actually overshot it by a pound, but I won’t brag.  LOL.  So, hyped about that.  It just gives me more motivation to continue on and to stay on track.  Seeing my doctor a couple of weeks ago has really put things back into perspective for me and I have been working hard to get the weight off and to get my numbers in a good place.  I’ve even been…going to the gym! Gasp!  I also created a spreadsheet I’ve entitled, “Tracking Me” that I am using to track all of my meals, blood sugars, workout activity and weight.  I’m not usually a micromanaging, write down every thing person but the studies that say keeping a food diary helps you to achieve your goals was telling the truth.  It’s really been helping me to see every single thing that I put into my mouth.  It’s holding me accountable.  As soon as I figure out how, I’m going to upload the spreadsheet here.

The last Wednesday Weigh-In I did was on August 22nd and I was 173.8.  This morning’s numbers are below.

Weight: 168.8 lbs

Lbs released: 5.0

Lbs to go: 38.8

I’m in the 160s!  I haven’t seen the 160s since 2008, maybe?  Yay!

I’m going on a cruise this upcoming Sunday, so I won’t have a new update for next week.  So, we shall see where I am around December 12th.  I’m going to try to be good on this cruise. Pray for me!

Next milestone goal is to get down to 156 lbs.

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Where I Am

I almost cannot believe that I have not posted since August. But in some ways I can.

When I first began this site, I was very fired up about my quest to understand and defeat diabetes.  I still am, but in hindsight I think that I may have been slightly over zealous and may have thought it was going to be easier than it really is.  This is not to say that I do not believe it can be done.  I definitely do!  I’m just beginning to realize that it’s going to take longer than I anticipated and in order to continue my mission to dump diabetes and live healthier, I need to get out of this rut that I am in.

I’ve had to admit to myself that I do not live a life that is conducive to being healthy.  I don’t make a lot of time for myself.  I am stressed.  And when I do have some downtime, unfortunately I have been spending it trying to “catch up” on sleep or in front of the television.  Bad, I know.  And each time I see one of my doctors they all say/ask the same thing, “Are you making time to focus on yourself and get healthy? And I say, I will and…I don’t.  I’ve just been busy running around: work, school, two businesses…  I definitely don’t come first.  Even though, I feel like all of those things are for me ultimately they aren’t necessarily healthy or helpful to the improvement of my health.  My schedule is hectic.

Although over the last month or so I have cooked more than I usually do, I eat out an awful lot.  I try to make healthier choices when I am ordering, but I don’t always.  Sometimes, I just want some fries!  And as crazy as it sounds, I was never one for desserts.  Every once in a while I’d indulge, but I’ve never been a sweets person…until now.  For some reason lately, I have been craving sweets.  It’s EVIL! I don’t know what it is.  Someone suggested that it may actually be the medicine (Metformin) that is making me feel sugar deficient.  I don’t know, but I need to get over that.

It just feels like I’ve fell off.  And it’s because I did.  And the numbers prove that because I saw my Endo yesterday and my A1C is 7.4.  Up from the 7.2 that it was in August.  Which was up from the 7.0 it was three months prior.  So, she’s put me on the lowest dose of Januvia and strongly suggested that I lose 50 lbs.  UGH!  Frustration!

I don’t want to beat myself up about this.  It won’t help.  I’ll still be taking 100 pills a day and needing to drop the weight of an elementary school student.  I need to refocus and re-access what my intentions are.  Look for an upcoming goal list.  I definitely believe in writing out my visions/intentions.  Also, I need to get back to my Wednesday Weigh-Ins and just holding myself accountable in general.

I’m going to do this.  It’s just going to take time.

 

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Other Updates

Last week was a pretty emotional week for me regarding my health.  I had two appointments.

The first appointment was with my Endocrinologist.  The first thing we discussed was that I had gained a couple of pounds since my last visit three months ago.  Honestly, I thought I had done much worse since I had completely fallen off for a couple of months.  She also did my A1C and it was 7.2 which is higher than the 7.0 it was last visit.  This was disappointing, but again – not surprising.  Ideally, she’d like for me to be under 6.0.  So, of course, I have work to do. I need to get motivated again to reach my health and fitness goals and not allow my current stresses to continue to deter me. My next appointment with her is in November.  It’s time to get it done.

My second appointment was with my OB/GYN.  He’s probably the only doctor I hadn’t seen since my diagnosis so I had to tell him about my diabetes.  I wanted to discuss with him how diabetes would affect my reproductive health and if there was anything that I should be concerned about.  His first comments were that I should immediately tell him if I was planning to become pregnant.  One of my main questions was “Does having diabetes automatically equate to having gestational diabetes?”  PubMed Health defines Gestational Diabetes as high blood sugar (diabetes) that starts or is first diagnosed during pregnancy – usually diagnosed around the 24th week of the pregnancy.  His response was that those are two different things as gestational diabetes starts during a pregnancy but as someone who currently has diabetes, I would be considered to have “diabetes in pregnancy.”  Further he stated that any pregnancy I would have would be considered “high risk” and planning a pregnancy would be important.

According to the CDC:

Blood sugar that remains high in a pregnant woman with type 1 or type 2 diabetes can cause her baby to have the following health problems:

  • Birth defects, especially of the brain, spine, and heart
  • Increased birth weight
  • Nerve damage to the shoulder during delivery
  • Low blood sugar after birth
  • Increased chance of overweight, obesity, and/or diabetes later in life

Further…

In a woman with preexisting diabetes (which includes type 1 and type 2), blood sugar that remains high can trigger or worsen certain health problems, including:

  • High blood pressure
  • Preeclampsia
  • Kidney disease
  • Nerve damage
  • Heart disease
  • Blindness

Also, a woman with preexisting diabetes whose blood sugar remains high has an increased chance of:

  • Miscarriage
  • Preterm birth
  • Stillbirth
  • C-section

This news CRUSHED me.  That may be an understatement.  I was devastated. So much, that I texted my mom and told her that I wasn’t  having children and just getting a puppy.  I mean, although my doctor never said, “Davina, you cannot have children.” all I heard were the negatives.  The risks or harm to my unborn child and myself.  As a childless woman in my thirties who would very much love to be a mother one day, I already think about all of the risks of getting older and having a child. Especially, since I’m not currently married or dating anyone.  I am just feeling a lot of pressure and that the odds are against me.  And now I’m filled with tons of worries.

  • Is it even worth it?
  • How would I deal with having a possible difficult pregnancy?
  • What if I had a sick child?  What about the guilt from that?
  • If I decide to have a child, should I really wait much longer
  • How would I feel if I never had a child?
  • Should I explore other options?

It may seem like I’m overreacting, but these are my true fears.  Things I really need to consider.  I’m in a less unhappy and teary place this week, but these concerns are still there.  And, I do feel like I need to make some choices for myself and possibly my future child(ren).  But first, I need to bog down and get my diabetes under control because baby or not, I’m still at risk for so may health issues that will affect just me alone if I’m not well.  And if I don’t take care of me, I know I can’t take care of anyone else.

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Wednesday Weigh-in #19 & #20

Last week (#19):

Weight: 176.0 lbs

Lbs released: 0.0

Lbs to go: 46.0

No change from the week before.

Today (#20):

Weight: 173.8 lbs

Lbs released: 2.2

Lbs to go: 43.8

 

Yay for some release!

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Wednesday Weigh-In #18

Ok…back at it!

Weight: 176.0 lbs

Lbs released: 0.0

Lbs to go: 46.0

Since my last weigh-in (June 6th), I’ve gained 1.6 lbs.  I’ll say, “not bad” for completely falling off for 2 months.  But, I know it’s unacceptable with my health condition.

As you can see, I didn’t add any Weight Watchers numbers.  I’ve decided to discontinue my membership and I officially cancelled yesterday.  Partially, because I noticed that although some of the practices were helping with my weight release, my blood sugars weren’t working well with WW.  I stand behind WW as an awesome tool, but right now I don’t think it’s for me and my nutritionist agrees.  Also, I joined WW with a group at work and my workload has been so hectic I haven’t been able to attend the meetings and it just became another bill.  So long, Weight Watchers!

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